It's like riding a bicycle...sort of

Tonight, I kind of remembered how to "do" school. It was a major breakthrough, because I'd been having serious anxiety and stress over it. I mean, I have a paper and a presentation due plus a midterm exam this Saturday, and it'll only be my third class! That's because I'm taking this accelerated course (7 weeks instead of 14). In essence, I've had about 5 weeks of lectures in just two. The great thing about this is, in 5 more weeks, my class will be over and I'll start a new one. The bad thing is, there's really no time - particularly if you've been out of academia for awhile - to remember how to do stuff like papers and midterms (presentations, on the other hand, are no problem, since I have to do them a lot for work).

I still don't feel like I have a very good system in place for getting everything done. In undergrad, I went to class, went to work, came home, studied/did homework, and then did it all again the next day. That was kind of it. I mean, sure, I had fun on the weekends, but that was different. Now, I get up early, get myself and the kid ready to go, drop her at daycare, go to work, pick her up, make/have dinner, hang out with the family, put her to bed, then try to do my reading or studying...which so does not work, because after all that I'm tired, and I end up falling asleep on the couch with random highlighter marks all over my book where I dozed off and scribbled.

But tonight...I started getting back in the swing of things. I worked on my paper, with helpful feedback and perspective from my fabulous husband (the topic is one that's close to his gamer heart, having to do with brand positioning of console game systems), and actually started feeling like I remembered how to do school work. At least a little bit. We'll see when the grades come in, I guess...but I feel, for the first time, like I might have some teensy semblance of control over this thing.

It's a wonder anybody ever goes back to school when they have families and jobs. This must be sort of like pregnancy and childbirth - in the throes of it, you're like, "Why on earth did I think this was a good idea?!" But after it's over, you go, "Oh, that's why."

Of course, if I were getting my degree in nine months instead of, say, four years, that would be nice.